Wednesday, September 30, 2009

The Laundromat

Once again I find myself sitting amongst the vibrating, screeching, tumbling echos of the laundromat. People in the laundromat....it give a whole new perspective of the human condition.

The first person to catch my attention is a woman who has taken over two full banks of washers that will take up to six regular loads in each one... looking at her as she gathers her things I realize she's a mother who hasn't done laundry in a few weeks... How do i know? she brought her laundry in lawn & leaf bags and the amount of bags alone fills up one of those deep laundry baskets on wheels three fourths of the way up and has the look on her face that says "I can't believe I'm doing this AGAIN! life sucks"

Just two rows away from Mrs. life sucks is Mr. Life sucks! NoOOoooO!!!! Noooo NO!!!!! They are not together as in husband and wife....they are together however by expression.. He's wearing one of those "You might be a redneck if" T-shirts...it's pulled up above his hairy fat belly button..his cap proclaiming his prowess as the world's Greatest fisherman...his holy sweatpants catch your attention because you could have sworn you saw something move in them....NOOOOO not that!!!!....you can see his tighty somethings i don't know if that color is still considered white....and then to finish this fashion idol outfit of the week is combat boots... not your run of the mill combat boots they are camouflage combat boots....untied.... the overall effect of the entire presentation of these two is too much for me and i have to step outside and get some air.....

this is where i used to smoke but since i quit smoking February 10th i just stood out there laughing...filing away the scene so i can share it with you....

Then in comes college students wearing hoodies of their various schools, sweats and looking like they haven't slept in four days,they have that 'hangover smell" , stale beer & cold pizza...never going to make it to classes... but hey we're doing laundry we're good!

The old ladies are another subset of people all together.. you have you ritzy botox loving sophisticate who walks in with a Gucci laundry bag on wheels...her outfit is form fitting and she is wearing a trendy blouse after she gets her wash going she stands there like a hooker...hip thrust out to one side...she sounds like she is trying to suck a piece of spinach from between her teeth.......you know that if she was allowed to smoke inside she would be... complaining all the while about how long it took the washer to do it's job.... not admitting to anyone she is just there to be around people...her washer and dryer at home work just fine.

The grandmotherly type comes in just to wash her quilts and afghans...she is short and round and cuddly looking...a twinkle in her eye that I interpret as laughter....she most likely smells like fresh baked anything....she's the type of woman you love to hug because she brings you comfort just by being who she is. I once saw a grandmotherly type who was wearing a hunter green winter cape... all i could think of was Mother Goose in a really old book of nursery rhymes that my family had when we were children...I miss that book i wonder if someone from my family has it or is it just another thing that has faded into the past like so many other things...

There she goes....lil miss sorority...the rich college girl who is going to be in a sorority as soon as she does her load of delicates in a 'public washer' .. but you know that later that night the whole sorority will burn the panties she washed in the public laundromat. you know full well that she never touched a bottle of laundry soap and she never will again after she does this hazing thing...

The new mom is the next to come in...you can tell she was very careful how she dressed... made sure her hair was done... the laundry bag is even spotless...you can tell she wants to prove to the world that she Has conquered this new mother thing....but then the look you catch in her eyes tells you there's nothing she would love more then to sleep for a week....

Men in the laundromat.... another enigma that always seems to make me smile... you have your young men who are still full tilt into trolling the bars and looking for single women everywhere to put another notch in their bedposts so to speak....they are not at all suddle i in fact heard a guy say to a girl "If I told you you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" oh GAG me with a spoon....modern hip girls actually fall for this?? ....the one i watched giggled and thrusts her near breasts out so the made tiny lil mounds against her size too small t-shirt....another candidate for the IBTC....For those who do not know the IBTC is the Itty Bitty Titty Committee....whats that?? it's the committee for small breasted women who have fried eggs where their boobs should be (trying to remember who had this t-shirt when i was a teenager (ha ha cringe, girl, cringe) or a girl who bought a one size fits all bra and it's too big...(not mentioning any names there either))

Now back on subject....lol....my mind flies in so many directions while I'm typing i think i have a form of ADD but only for when I'm typing.....i currently have three blogs in the works...there i go again....

MEN....Laundromats....MEN in LAUNDROMATS.... O.K. I think i am sufficiently refocused....Newsboys hats...men in newsboy hats in laundromats...you know what hats i mean don't you?....the one that if you see an old man driving wearing a hat of this type you move waaaaaaaaaay out of his way.....this kind:


While on the road you do everything you can avoid these men in the laundromat i strongly recommend if you've a need for entertainment grab a seat and just listen to him talk....this is a guy who has lived his life...life wasn't necessarily easy for him but he did it....he was in the service...maybe even a Vietnam Vet...he's raised his family ...he's a grandpa....raised a grand kid or two.....is still married and loves his wife with all his heart and soul...he is still living life....traveling...visiting family and friends....seeing the things and doing the things that life would not allow him to do until at this time of his life....he is very friendly and will pretty much stand around talking as long as he has an audience...he gives you so much hope... even on the worst day you will think of him and smile the hope that when you are his age you will be as content as he is.....it's all you can really hope for....that when you reach your golden years you too will have the smile of the 'Old Man' in the laundromat.

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